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Iku Kazoo
Ever wondered about that hot kazoo player? Well now you can know the deepest roots of that sexxxy mama!
Name: Iku Kazoo
POSiTiON iN THE WENiS: kazoo, vocals, and other stuff
AGE: illegal
LOCATiON: heranus
STATUS: single
STORY: on February 31, in the dawning of the age of Aquarius, a new species was brought forth to this world. Although at first glance she seemed human, she was not, she was a super being, she was....iKU KAZOO! Born on the planet Heranus, during the galactic space war "GunkaGunka" her parents; SGT. Bobak Watdadillyo Kazoo, and Mistress Mademoiselle Seņorita Kazoo, sent her away in a flying clam shell to a galaxy far far away to be safe from the galactic battle. After 5 years of flight and sleep, Iku awoke to find a telegraph in her shell with it reading "Hi, how are you? Your parents are both dead," this disturbed Iku immensely and caused her to cry for another year or so. Then one day, she decided to immerse from her shell and check out her new found planet. No, this was no ordinary friendly planet, it was......THE PLANET OF THE MIDGETS!!!!!!!!!!! Iku, being extremely frightened by midgets, pissed her pants and tried to reenter her safe shell abode, but it was crushed by a rushing stampede of 2 feet tall, round assed, little people. In a panic, she rushed up the nearest midget tree, which was a whopping 5 feet tall, and perched in terror. For 6 days and nights Iku perched in that tree, trembling with fear and hoping for a spark of luck to save her. However it did not come from above, but from her tear ducts! Since she was so upset over her parents being dead, being perched on a tree, and being pursued by a pack of wild midgets, she began to cry again. This time, she cried jumbo tears, each one as large as a coconut. After 3 hours of continuous sobbing, Iku realized she had cried so much, she had drowned the midgets, wiping out every last one of them. Hoppping down from her tree, Iku discovered dead midgets float very nicely, and fashioned a boat out of midget corpses (however, she did receive a few bites to the back of the knee from the few half alive ones) and paddled her way off into the sunset.
After a week of paddling around the midget planet on 4 semi-decaying soggy corpses, Iku reached a rock, not just any rock, but the rock of fortune. It introduced its self "Hello I am the rock of fortune" and told Iku she can have one wish, and it shall be granted. iku thought long and hard before
coming to her decision: she decided she wanted to leave the wretched planet of the midgets and be put somewhere more normal sized, thus, she was sucked
into the rock of fortune and shot straight on to Earth. At first Iku was stared at, its not everyday you see a naked Iku come falling from the sky, then the people took a liking to her. She became a citizen of Earth and met a friend, this friend was Wheetamoo Openmouth. Wheetamoo and Iku decided a few years later when they were teenagers to start a band. So they did with a few other friends over the years named Sinnamon Klickymaka, Notoreyus Fourstrings, Emofille Banjo and the illustrious Ted Knickerson, this my friends was the dawning of the WENiS!!!! The rest, is yet to come.
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